Thursday, July 25, 2013

Hollywood Life: Lea Michele: Cory Monteith Loved You So Much, He’d Want You To Heal

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thumbnail Lea Michele: Cory Monteith Loved You So Much, He'd Want You To Heal
Jul 25th 2013, 22:01, by Bonnie Fuller

Lea, it’s been less than two weeks since the man you loved died tragically. Naturally, you’re in a state of deep, deep grief, but you must know somewhere inside that Cory would want you to smile again one day.

Lea Michele — you must give in fully to grieving for your beloved boyfriend Cory Monteith, who died so unexpectedly at the way too young age of 31.

Lea Michele, What You’re Feeling Is Normal

It’s a natural process that you must go through to express the whole melange of overwhelming emotions that you’re feeling — desolation, regret, guilt, loneliness and hopelessness.

“Lea is in shock right now — she’s going through the normal process that she has to go through,” explains Dr. Gilda Carle, the 30-second Therapist for Today.

I’m sure you’re missing Cory terribly. Everything you do, everywhere you look, everyone you talk to — everything reminds you of Cory, brings back memories and amplifies your regrets about what might have been for him, and for you and he together.

“I’m sure on some level she does feel guilt,” psychotherapist Dr. Robi Ludwig tells HollywoodLife.com EXCLUSIVELY. “Just because someone feels guilty doesn’t mean they’re responsible for it. She may wonder, could she have done anything differently, what signs did I miss?”

Again, it would be natural for you to feel that way, Lea.

Lea, You Helped Cory So Much

But the truth is, Lea, that you did everything in your power to protect Cory and help save him from his addiction demons.

“It's very important that Lea learns how to not blame herself for the tragic loss of Cory,” addiction specialist Steven Orenstein, LMFT, told us exclusively. “She may be questioning herself and saying, ‘If only I didn't let Cory go to Vancouver,’ ‘If only I went to Vancouver with Cory.’ There is nothing Lea could have done to prevent Cory's unfortunate death, and she needs to fully understand this. She also needs to go to individual therapy for her grief and loss issues.”

It was you who insisted that Cory go back into rehab and you fully and publicly supported him, telling the world, “I love and support Cory and will stand by him through this. I am grateful and proud he made this decision.”

The bottom line, Lea, is that you were a great girlfriend and best friend to Cory, and he loved and appreciated you for it.

Cory knew that you were the best thing that ever happened to him. He was beaming with pride at you when the two of you made your last red carpet appearance at the 12th annual Chrysalis Butterfly Ball in L.A. on June 8.

Cory Loved You So Much

He told InStyle he was “the luckiest man” because of you.

He was totally motivated by you, your strength, your love for him, and your eagerness to help him get healthy.

Unfortunately, his demons got the better of him and he relapsed, as so many addicts do. Tragically, when he fell back, the dangerous mix of alcohol and heroin he imbibed proved deadly.

But Lea, Cory would not want his death to darken your entire life. He would want you to be able to enjoy your life and to fulfill your dreams, which he really believed in.

He admired your talent and would want you to follow the incredible career path that you’re on.

You feel “like you may never find someone to love you the way Cory did,” according to a report in OK! But Cory loved you so much that he, no doubt, would want you to find love again. You’re only 26 — he wouldn’t want you to be alone for the rest of your life. A lifetime is a long time.

Lea, It Takes Time To Grieve

It’s understandable that you won’t even be able to think of anyone else that way for a very long time — you must grieve in whatever way works for you, and that can take time.

But at some point, you will find happiness again.

“Nobody knows how long it could take,” Dr. Gilda told us. “She could wake up one moment and think, 'I feel okay right now.' It depends on the person, and everybody around her should just give her love and support and allow her to process this.”

And that’s exactly what they’re doing. Lean on those close to you, and remember that one day, you will feel OK again. Ultimately, Cory would want you to have a happy and fulfilled life. That would be his wish for you.

All of our thoughts go out to you, Lea. And we promise that things will get better.

WATCH: Cory Monteith Autopsy Reveals Fatal Mixture Of Heroin And Alcohol


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– Bonnie Fuller

More Lea Michele Grieving News:

  1. Cory Monteith Was Planning Birthday Surprise For Lea Michele Before Death
  2. Lea Michele 'Doesn't Want To Get Out Of Bed' After Cory Monteith's Death
  3. Lea Michele's Final Kiss Goodbye With Cory Monteith Revealed

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